Finding

Finding a place is .hard.

First it has to be far enough away

It has to be close enough to get to

It has to have a good enough menu, online,

And look like it's a place to linger.

It has to be nice, welcoming, pleasant, but not stiff

It has to have a hum. Not too quiet.

It has to be open

It has to be kind

The people have to include my people. The food has to be good

Bonus points if it's also pretty.

When I pull up, parking should not be too hard or too far or time limited.

There can be traffic but not too fast or too much.

Not too crowded.

Conversations I can easily ignore.

It has to feel like my place somehow, my place, like I belong place, like I can be anonymous and welcome place. Where I am not required to be too alike nor accidentally too different.

I wonder as I squint at the window,

Does everyone have this?

my various selves suggest that it is they

that make it so damn difficult.

Not that I resent them...much, usually.

But sometimes I just long for something different

Not my everyday

A whole other cadence.

walk into every place on the street and feel... unremarkable.